My life is a constant discipline that my music doesn't really matter like everyone else's and that I'm bad because I can't play 1 instrument well enough to go pro!
That's why I quit amateur choir. I thought I was a music major now. It's not about me going back to being an amateur while others advance.
People wonder why I quit church choir when they confront me, it seems, or why if I am doing violin I am not piano and also forgetting organ.
I see people sing for holidays or flying in the air, and I can't do any of that. I've tried to record and tour, though I had already lost my voice.
Funny, I was in church choir in college, and no one seemed to care or notice.
I could feel it in the college, before they told me to adjust my courses for the worse, as far as I can tell. I ended up having to leave, too.
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